Why Waiting for the Event is Always Worse Than the Event Itself

We have all been there. You have a presentation, a doctor's appointment, or a social gathering on Friday.

It is currently Tuesday. But your heart is racing now. You aren't sleeping now. You are sweating and trembling now.

By the time Friday actually arrives, you are exhausted. And often, once the event starts, you realize, "Oh. This actually isn't that bad."

This is Anticipatory Anxiety. It is the habit of suffering through a catastrophe that hasn't happened yet—and likely never will.

The Brain as a Simulator Your brain is a prediction engine. Its job is to keep you safe by predicting potential threats. When you have anxiety, this simulator is calibrated too high. It creates vivid, 4K mental movies of everything going wrong.

• What if I faint?

• What if I forget my lines?

• What if there’s traffic and I’m late?

Your body doesn't know the difference between a real tiger and an imagined tiger. It releases stress hormones based on the simulation. You are physically experiencing the trauma of the event before it even occurs.

Interrupting the "What If" Timeline The only way to stop the simulator is to bring your brain back to the "What Is."

1. Catch the "What If": Notice when your brain starts writing a horror movie script about the future.

2. Label it: Say out loud, "This is anticipation. This is a simulation."

3. Return to "What Is": Look at your feet. Where are you right now? Are you safe in this specific second?

You can handle Friday when Friday comes. You don't need to live it on Tuesday.