People respond to loss and grief in different ways, as the experience is unique for each of us. However, we all do share common ground in the experience of grief. Many people experience emotions in a way which they have never experienced emotions before. Emotions of shock, denial, anger and guilt are nearly universal for those experiencing grief. It is quite normal for the power of these emotions to interfere with your life. Some people eat or drink to excess, or lose their appetite altogether. Trouble concentrating and even loss of interest in enjoying your favorite activities are normal reactions to loss.
What is Grief?
Grief is the emotional, physical, and spiritual reaction to a death or loss. Many authors and physicians write of grieving as a five or seven
stage process, but the nature of grief does not follow steps like a smoking cessation plan, or a business model. No, grief is not that simple. The emotions are intense and they don’t just leave never to return, or fade away to nothing. Tumultuous emotions that strike at the very core of our lives don’t follow rules according to stages, instead it seems that they flow in waves of varied intensity with no regard to order. The grieving process takes time and the intensity of the grief is directly affected by how sudden or expected the loss was and how close you were to the person who passed away. This is why it is important to learn how to handle these sometimes overpowering emotions. This is where the Midwest Center's
Attacking Anxiety & Depression Program comes in. The program gives people the tools they need to identify, cope with and overcome stress and anxiety in their lives.
Coping with Grief
Just as we all experience grief in different ways, we all deal with grief in different ways. Some people withdraw from the people around them, while others reach out for support. Some people prefer to become very busy to take their minds off of the loss, while others become lethargic. For some, talking about the person with friends and loved ones is easy, and for others this is easier to do with a therapist. There is no prescribed way to grieve. However, it is important to avoid self destructive or dangerous behavior like drinking and drug use. These activities only act to postpone the pain and can serve to make matters much worse.
Take Care of Yourself
The stress of losing a loved one can adversely affect you mentally and physically. Here are a few suggestions for helping you cope with the loss.
- Remember that grief is a normal emotion and it will get easier over time.
- Attend rituals. Go to the services that honor the deceased and share in the comfort of others doing the same. Spend time with friends and family who are also experiencing the loss.
- Express yourself. Even if you are not interested in talking about your feelings, writing them down will help.
- Exercise and eat right. It may be difficult to get motivated, so alter your schedule accordingly for exercise. Eating may not be an appealing idea, but it’s important to maintain a healthy diet for balancing your body and mind.
- Enroll in a self-help program like Attacking Anxiety & Depression Program to help you develop coping strategies.
When To Seek Help
If you have been grieving for four to six months and you still cannot perform your normal routines, or if you are having thoughts of hurting yourself, tell someone immediately. Consulting a therapist is usually effective in situations like these, and it could be the key to regaining your life.
